Gideon’s journal – Great Naked Freedom Escape

Today I ALMOST escaped my oppressive bondage!  Here is the tale of how I almost tasted freedom! The day started off normal enough, I was instructed to cover up my squishy and jiggly bits with clothes.  This routine chore seems so important to the big people.  So, I indulged their irrational demands and found someRead more

Toddler Sunrise

Dear Diary, I was deeply involved in a now-forgotten dream.  My weekend slumber was free of stress as even my sub-conscious seemed undeniably aware of the absence of any set alarm clocks.  Then suddenly, SMACK!  A tiny hand came down hard on the left side of my face. I was ripped from my wonderful andRead more

Captain Poopypants thinks I’m cute

Dear Diary, Sometimes I’m wrong … like REALLY wrong, and I deeply hate it! Once during my time as the manager for the low-income hotel, I was having a conversation with a coworker when I was interrupted by a very loud and very unusual noise.  I left the conversation to check out the lobby whenRead more

I felt like Wile E. Coyote

Dear Diary, There was a day where raising chickens made me feel like Wile E. Coyote… My time as an egg rancher had provided my feeble body with a few benefits. No, it didn’t get me in shape. No, it didn’t …. well, whatever else you are wondering about that would matter to normal people.Read more