Gideon’s journal – Great Naked Freedom Escape

Today I ALMOST escaped my oppressive bondage!  Here is the tale of how I almost tasted freedom! The day started off normal enough, I was instructed to cover up my squishy and jiggly bits with clothes.  This routine chore seems so important to the big people.  So, I indulged their irrational demands and found someRead more

Toddler Sunrise

Dear Diary, I was deeply involved in a now-forgotten dream.  My weekend slumber was free of stress as even my sub-conscious seemed undeniably aware of the absence of any set alarm clocks.  Then suddenly, SMACK!  A tiny hand came down hard on the left side of my face. I was ripped from my wonderful andRead more

Captain Poopypants thinks I’m cute

Dear Diary, Sometimes I’m wrong … like REALLY wrong, and I deeply hate it! Once during my time as the manager for the low-income hotel, I was having a conversation with a coworker when I was interrupted by a very loud and very unusual noise.  I left the conversation to check out the lobby whenRead more

I felt like Wile E. Coyote

Dear Diary, There was a day where raising chickens made me feel like Wile E. Coyote… My time as an egg rancher had provided my feeble body with a few benefits. No, it didn’t get me in shape. No, it didn’t …. well, whatever else you are wondering about that would matter to normal people.Read more

Invisible hammers and couch beds

Dear Diary, When life gives you invisible hammers, make couch beds. I was working at the low-income hotel, in the middle of another hectic day of trying to solve problems for an excessive number of people.  Ronald approached the front desk with a demeanor of defeat and frustration.  He had been by several times recently,Read more